endings

.
one day i will leave you
or you will leave me
and one of us will break down and question
demand answers which will never come
and the other will move on and fuck with abandon
come enough for all the answers which didn't




why?

it was because you told me you were happy
and held me in your arms contented
that i turned my mouth away
and remembered when you beseeched the lovers
who lay in comfort
under double duvets
who held hands at parties
and deciding that their personality had done them well in finding a mate
allowed it to rest

it was because suddenly i was enough
and you stopped desiring that we fucked
in alleyways with my dress yanked to my waist
and no underwear
but were happy with me in your bed
to kiss tenderly
and softly hold
whispering things my mother could have
happily overheard

it was because you stopped talking about the ass
of the girl who worked in the record shop
and i stopped picturing her indie shirts in disarray
pushed against the rack of smiths records
doing all manner of things
that Morrissey would disapprove of

it was when i became half of us
we seemed less than the sum of our parts
and tired of waiting for you to break my heart
i broke yours